apparently we've been going out for just about a year and a half now.
it's crazy how time flies, isn't it?
to celebrate, i've decided to post the story of us here. a while back, EK asked how we came to be, and i'm pretty much copying and pasting almost exactly what i sent to her. i tried to tell the short version, but it's still quite a wordy story...
i met the boy through linda, who lived with him for about 6 months. i remember taking a trip up north a week or so before she moved in with him. she picked me up from the airport. the first thing she said to me was not "hey how's it going" or "how was your flight?" - it was "sooooo....my roommate's cute." i remember going "um, that's nice...." and thinking, “seriously, that’s the first thing you saay to me?!”
fast forward a few months. it was december, i was up north again. i needed to borrow a dress from linda, so i went to her apartment. the boy was about to head out. introductions were made. now, when linda was telling me about him a couple months earlier, she probably mentioned to me that she originally through he was korean because of his last name. so, i was under the impression that he was korean, or he was half korean or something like that. surprise, surprise, he wasn't. as soon as he walked out the door, i so eloquently blurted out "i didn't know he was a whitey!" (classy, i know). then i admitted that, yes, he was cute...but i really didn't think much of it. i probably wasn't going to see much of him, anyway, and we barely interacted.
fast forward about 6 weeks. i was planning another visit for MLK day. a couple of my other friends were also planning to make a trip, and i figured it might be fun to join them. i was also planning a zachary's dinner, and recruiting people to come, since zachary's is way more fun with a bunch of people. as part of my recruiting efforts, i posted on linda's facebook wall, "tell (notice i used TELL instead of ASK. how demanding am i? heh.) your roommate to come to zachary's with us." i didn't really expect him to come - i was just trying to find people. she later told me that she showed him the post, and i exclaimed, "why did you do that for?!" but then she mentioned that he was coming, and all was good.
zachary's night came around...we were all there, waiting. the boy and linda were late, and i was getting annoyed. they finally showed up...linda tried to re-introduce us, but we both said that we remembered each other. i remember thinking that he was WAY cuter than i'd remembered him. it was his hair, or something, i thought. anyways. dinner was fun. i originally had this impression that the boy was quiet and shy - but he really isn't! he was making conversation, and i was mildly surprised, but was really enjoying myself. later, 4 of us went back to the apartment to figure out what to do next, and we were all chatting. i found out that we had a bunch of things in common. we decided to go to this bar to play pool.
upon arrival, the boy told me, "we should be partners." let me note that i am a TERRIBLE pool player. seriously, i cannot be helped. i can barely hit the ball, let alone aim it to go where it's supposed to. so i was like, "are you sure?" and he said "yes." so it was me and him against linda and elaine. we won, mostly thanks to his vastly superior skills. i miraculously made a couple of shots though (two, to be exact. hah), and every time i did, he got genuinely excited and would try to give me one of those super complicated high fives (you know, up, down, around, and blah blah blah...). throughout the night, he kept glancing over and nudging me (those nudges later drove me crazy - WHAT DO THEY MEAN?!?! another friend's boyfriend was like "well...maybe he was trying to point something out to you"). i got the sense that he was flirting with me, but i wasn't really sure. either way, i had quite a nice time that night, and went to bed pretty happy.
the next night, linda, elaine, and i were hanging out with everyone else (the others who came up that weekend). linda was like, "soooo...you and my roommate were hitting it off last night." i replied that i'd sensed something was going on, but i thought it was all me. she then mentioned that the reason for their late arrival the night before was because SOMEONE was taking forever fixing his hair and changing outfits (then went to linda and was like "how do i look?" HA). she also mentioned that he never, EVER went out with linda and elaine, even when they invited him to come along. i found this information quite interesting, and invited him to come with us to lunch the day i was flying back to LA. he came. i flew home, giddy.
upon my return, i posted a blog entry mentioning a "boy," along with a photo of a boy (even though i posted it because i liked the shot, NOT to give a visual of said boy). the post was imported to facebook, and linda found it. she then proceeded to SHOW HIM. i wanted to KILL HER. he told her he was flattered, then proceeded to chuckle. nothing happened afterwards, and since i was way too mortified to try to make a move, i just assumed that he wasn't interested (story of my life), and left it at that…even though i still kinda hoped.
another month, another trip (cheap plane tickets, hooray!). my timing was impeccable, as both of them were moving out about a week after my trip. i figured i'd try to make a move, and if i failed, no big deal since i'd probably never see him again. i invited him to zachary's again right before my departure...i hadn't heard from him, so i assumed he wasn't coming. i made it up north (it was quite an adventure, since i came thisclose to missing my flight), went to dinner with l&e, and then ended up back the apartment. the boy came out of his room to say hi, and it wasn't awkward, which i took as a good sign. he then mentioned that he heard that we were going to zachary's, and he'd like to come. i was pleased.
dinner ended up being just the four of us, but it was fun. we went back to play pool afterwards. this is when things got really interesting :) while waiting for a table, we were all hanging out on one of the couches...e&l got up to get a drink, leaving the two of us by ourselves. we started talking about how i wanted to go to europe (he's been, and he's been to england a bunch of times, since his mom is british), and how he wanted to go to japan (i've been several times), and how we should go together some day. he said i should move up north, since i was spending so much time here. meanwhile, our pool table was ready. he had his hand on my leg. much to e&l's protests, the boy and i ended up being partners again. they wanted a 3-to-1 game, but elaine's friend vijay showed up and i exclaimed, "i'm claiming james since you guys have 3 people now." i was terrible as usual. i didn't care, though... throughout the game, a very interesting sequence of events was taking place - shoulder massages, hugs, then forehead kisses. by that time, I was wondering when he was FINALLY going to kiss me. i kept looking up at him, and was slightly annoyed when i got yet another forehead kiss. our game ended, we all started hanging out in one of the booths. at one point, we just looked at each other and I knew it was going to happen. he kissed me.
we ended up hanging out a few more times over that weekend, and he ended up driving me to the airport. on the way there, he kept telling me that i should come back and visit, and i was like, "well DUH, i'm obviously going to be back" (at that time, i already had plans for coming back in mid-april. it was the end of february then). he also insisted that i come up for his birthday, but i said i couldn't make that work (funny how i ended up showing up a week later. hooray spontaneous trips with amy!). when i got back, i wondered if he'd call me, and he didn't for a few days...but i heard from linda that he ended up moving out the day after i left. i figured he was busy moving, and didn't think much of it. after a few days, though, i broke down and called him. i swore i wouldn't call first, but i did. he started calling me every single day after that, ending every conversation with "can i call you tomorrow?" … and he always did.
as you know, we dated long-distance for almost a year. i spent a fortune on plane tickets. it sucked, but we made the best of what we had, and we made it work (long-distance relationships aren't always doomed). it got harder and harder as time went on...saying goodbye at the airport became more and more difficult every time we had to do it, and it was getting harder to let go and walk into the terminal. over the summer, i decided to make the change to graphic design, and with that, took it as a cue to move up north. it wasn't a decision made for the sake of moving closer to him...there were many other reasons why it made sense for me, but i would be lying if i said that it had nothing to do with it. and i'm so glad i did it.
i thought it would be interesting to see how or if our relationship would change with me up here now, but so far, so good. it's been better than i expected. we still don't see each other ALL THE TIME, but that's better than once a month, and 20 miles better than 400. no more goodbyes at the airport (i remember the last time we did it. it was the crack of dawn, since i was supposed to fly to florida. half-asleep, i muttered "hey. we don't have to do this anymore." that was probably the easiest goodbye, since 1) i was excited to go to florida and so leaving was fine, and 2) i was moving in just over 2 weeks).
and now here we are. who knows what’s to come, and who knows where this is going to end up going, but he makes me so happy, and i feel so lucky to have him. that's what it's all about, right? i'm sure i annoy him to no end (actually, i KNOW i do, hah!) and drive him crazy all the time...but he's stuck with me. plus, he cooks for me...that's always a bonus ;)